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How Might Ministry Colleagues Help Grieving Pastors?

This is a challenging area for ministry colleagues. They are already busy with their own ministry work. A colleague’s grief always awakens their own memories of loss and grief. And disagreements over ministry issues and theological matters may complicate relationships. However, reaching beyond these realities to extend grace and ministry to those who grieve is a powerful affirmation of the gospel that lies at the center of ministry life. One pastor who had experienced a deep tragedy remembered, “A fellow pastor came, picked me up, drove to a nearby lake, and then just listened.” Of course, be sure that the grieving pastor is open to this kind of ministry. Remember:

  1. Maintain contact. Silence from you is experienced as rejection, and adds to the minister’s pain.
  1. Be sure that you have managed your own grief well so that your self-work (or lack thereof) doesn’t complicate the engagement with your colleague’s grief. 
  1. Don’t stay too long when visiting.
  2. See resources referred to in this blogpost created by Disability Concerns.