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#CRClistens: How to Stay in Conversation

May 25, 2016

The CRC Office of Social Justice and the Centre for Public Dialogue are inviting people to check out #CRClistens, a series of blog posts suggesting ways for readers to engage in tough conversations on issues related to justice

Titled “How to Stay in Conversation with ‘the Other Side’,” the series offers tips on keeping in communication with people with whom we strongly disagree.

Featured in this series are blogs by those who because of the nature of their jobs, the things about which they are passionate, or the people with whom they interact, have experience keeping hard conversations going with others.

“We hope that this series gives us some guidance and advice to begin to answer those questions of how to do this,” says Danielle Rowaan, Justice Communications Team Coordinator for OSJ and the Centre for Public Dialogue.

“Above all, we hope that this series will help you stay in conversation in constructive ways that honor and respect the image of God in those you disagree with and in the people affected by the issues you are talking about. We hope to learn together how to communicate in ways that build up the body of Christ.”

Some of the topics addressed by the writers so far include: “Listening — It’s More than Just Tolerance”; “Dialogue is Hard but it’s Worth it”; “I Think It’s More Complicated Than That,” and “Learning to be Gospel People.”

Writers so far include pastors, professors, speakers, an Anglican bishop, a senior web editor, and a life coach     .

“People have been excited to hear about the series,” said Rowaan. “I think many in the denomination are thinking about the need to learn to dialogue respectfully and cultivate the fruit of the Spirit as we near Synod 2016, which will include some controversial and polarizing discussions.”

In her blog, Kathy Smith of Calvin Theological Seminary gives three insights for having difficult, honest conversations. These include:

  • “Each person in the conversation needs to check his or her own heart. What are my motives in this conversation? Am I respecting the person with whom I disagree?”
  • “Make sure that the environment is safe for an open exchange of ideas. If people don’t feel safe and don’t trust that others in the dialogue truly value them, respect them and will listen to them, then they will react either in silence or violence, flight or fight. They’ll withdraw from the discussion, or go to war.”
  • “Practice the fine art of being kind and honest, showing grace and telling truth. In difficult conversations, we so often choose to be kind or honest, not both kind and honest. We capitulate to our own anxiety by either being kind at the expense of truth, or honest at the expense of kindness. But we can choose a better way.

Here's the landing page with a fuller description and a list of series posts published to date: http://dojustice.crcna.org/how-stay-conversation-%E2%80%9C-other-side%E2%80%9D.